Forever Changed...The Christmas and New Year Celebrations...

Well, Christmas has been over already for a few days and the New Year has arrived. Technically, though, this is my last post of the year 2008, although the New Year has just begun. Anw, really, SOMETHNG AMAZING HAPPENED TO ME THIS CHRISTMAS and in the days that followed. That is that God spoke to me through a book which my mum gave me for Christmas. Basically, there have been a few major issues in my life, well about mistakes that I’ve made and how I’m struggling to overcome them, about the loneliness and friendship thing and most problematic of all, how to live my life and what to do, to live life to the fullest, and to live for God’s glory, well essentially how to live out the life that God wants me to. And, just after Christmas and the days leading up to the New Year, a number of things came to me through my own thoughts and a lot from the book that my mum gave me for Christmas has helped me to address these issues in my life and help me understand what I need to do in response to the various circumstances in my life. And, now I’m more glad than ever and I thank God. Now, I’m feeling so much better and I’m clearer about everything. I’m really feeling joy in my heart and I’m filled with hope to truly live meaningfully, fully and well, to have fulfilment and contentment in my heart. And, I think I’ve truly been transformed and changed by the Lord forever, so I’m so confident and I’m so full of faith that my life is going to get better as I seek to live life with purpose, for God’s glory and honour God in all that I do, and live life to the fullest.

But, before I get into what I’ve learned and the revelation that God has given me, together with my reflections, I shall first share a little about how I headed into the Christmas period. Followed by how I celebrated Christmas and the New Year. And, I shall give my reflections on the year gone by.

Well, I had two ok days just before Christmas as I was feeling good again I guess. But, I seemed to be happier already in the weekend before Christmas coz I finally had a break through in that I seem to figure things out better, like I understood what was troubling me better and what I needed to do, thus, the two days before Christmas were good. And, like God really just seem to come to my rescue, not that He wasn’t with me through it all but suddenly after much prayers, thinking, reflecting and singing worship songs, I managed to get out of my unhappiness and depression, and I was able to hang on and trust the Lord through that point where I felt distant from God again. I could feel again God’s presence so strong in my life and He just felt so near again. God seem also to help me to finally understand what I’ve been having difficulty understanding.

And, even with all the other problems at home and stuff, God seem to give me assurance that everything was gonna be ok. I for the longest time haven’t been too bothered that I haven’t been able to meet any friends at all, having begun to feel evermore that God is with me and just recognising that I’m not alone with God always being there has made it feel great for me. And, I just really felt God’s mercy and that made me not bother about that mistakes that I’ve made and move on. Also, about how I felt my life is so not lived to the fullest and this holiday nothing I’ve done seems to matter and like I just couldn’t see how my holiday in any way was living up to the purposes God has for my life and glorifying God as much as it should, even if I knew that mundane stuff can glorify God if it is done as if it’s done for God’s glory.

But, He gave me wisdom to understand what really it is I need to do to be able to live life well and properly. At this point, I still am puzzled about what exactly I should do everyday so that each day is satisfying but at least now, I understand how God wants me to live my life and like the determinants as to deciding what to do with my time. Finally, I’m just really feeling joyful in all of my circumstances. And, I’m full of praise in my heart for God and I can really feel a passion inside of me again for God’s name. Everything just seems to be working out well, whether or not there are troubles and I just really got a peace of mind. This as I mentioned in my last post about how I finally got clear about stuff and have become more positive and cheerful about everything. So anw, this allowed me to really break free and feel better like never before, putting all unhappiness aside and moving on. Thus, I could really enjoy myself as Christmas approached. It was like I now knew what life is all about and was able to put everything behind me, to like begin on a new, fresh and clean slate. I mean, it’s like I previously wasn’t really living life in a way that was or at least I felt, that was completely the way it should be lived.

But, now I seem to understand what it takes to decide the things to do each day such that I can fulfil the purposes that God has for our lives. It’s like I’ve finally got it right and it’s just a matter of putting it into practise. Basically, I was beginning from my last post just before Christmas to now be determined to have the courage to do the things I want to do and take the initiative to make things happen in my life. And, as to making sure that I live life that way it should be lived, I understand that it requires me to do things everyday that allow me to achieve the purposes God has for my life and it is about making the most of the time I have, which is more than just staying at home everyday to just eat, sleep and play.

It’s like I realise that I’ve got to do more with my life than just take, yes, God is glad when we do everything including eating, sleeping and playing, as doing it for the Lord, and it has meaning and matters, but life is about more than that, it is about also making contributions too. We need to have a balance in our lives, for living for only some of the purposes God has for our lives is not the way to live life, it is about living for ALL the purposes. As to what we should do with our lives on a more specific note, in other words, how to live for all the purposes God has for our lives, it is about doing what we want to do as a guide as to what God’s will for us is, and since I had finally figured out what I really wanted from this holiday, it made it clear for me how I should go about deciding what to do with my holiday. And, I realised that as long as I’m doing what God intended for us as humans to do I’m bringing glory to God and living life the way it should be lived, thus since God wants us to enjoy our lives, I can do what I enjoy doing, of course as long as it is an activity that glorifies God, and not necessarily just enjoying myself per se but also making contributions through a means that I’m most passionate in using. Yea, that was how I was able to make sense of the situation and so be able now to truly forge ahead in the direction of truly living life, since I’ve figured the way. I’m now beginning to live…

Now then, so here’s a bit about how I celebrated Christmas and the New Years’ eve celebrations. Well, Christmas celebrations started off on Christmas eve for me, with a night service at church, which was a dinner followed by a service with a cantata and a short message by the pastor. And, briefly, the message was all about what Christmas means and the true story behind it all, and it was like a reminder of the greatest gift which we received on Christmas day that is Jesus Christ. Then, that night, with Christmas carols playing in the background, and some snacking on Christmas treats, we opened some of our presents, well most of them, just before like about 12 midnight. Then, the next day we went out for branch at Dome in the Dempsey Hill area. After that, we got home and just relaxed and played stuff at home. At the end of the day then, we had dinner with relatives who came over. We had like turkey, pork and lamb shank. Not to forget, log cake too. We spent the whole night, playing Mario Kart on WII, since our Guitar Heroes was being sent back to the manufacturing to be replaced like in two weeks. It was really fun watching them play, I mean, my cousins and my brothers and sister. Just imagine, like teenagers holding the WII remotes fitted into steering wheel like fixtures, and pretending to drive. Such a CLASSIC look man…!!! Of course, the best part, presents, got like a watch and a blanket (???), well, supposedly for watching late night movies. But, anw the best were the presents from my mum, two T-shirts, a choker (necklace), a shaver, and two books, most notably, the one called, God’s Answers To Life’s Difficult Questions.

Well, then, on Friday, just stayed home and slacked. While, on Saturday, went out with my brother, sister, two cousins, my aunt and my uncle to watch TWILIGHT, not bad a show I guess. Watched at Vivo City, and we had lunch at Carl’s Jr. and played at the arcade too. On Sunday, had Church, then, went out for dinner at Minori in UE Square and had Jap ala carte buffet, with my relatives and cousins. We ate so much lah, it was like impossible not to feel fat man, like we ate so much, that we were afraid they might like black list us or something, haha. And, like we ordered lots of sashimi, and we ate so fast that, we had to call it like the make-the-sashimi-disappear magic show. That’s really lame actually but well, haha. After that, we had drinks at Starbucks before we headed home. Finally, didn’t do much on Monday and Tuesday, except did a bit of reading and thinking and playing yea. But, on New Years’ eve, we hosted dinner for our church pastor and his wife. And, well watched the countdown from home.

Next, just want to comment a little about my reflections on the year gone by. Well, this year, had some of the best moments and some of the worst and toughest times for me in my life, but most importantly just really wanna thank God for seeing me through and for using all my circumstances for His perfect plan. And, in a year were friendship for me was few and far between, I just wanna thank the few people who showed some form of concern for me. And, whatever differences between all of us at home, I’m just glad to have had gone through another year together, even if my sis was far from home. And, as for the things I’ve done, I’ve had many good experiences this year which I’ve had mentioned in my other post. I’ve truly grown as a person and it’s been an amazing year. Sure, there were things I wished I had done or things I wished I had done better, but at the end of the day I must say that it where we draw the learning points every year, and now I just look forward to the next year to be able now to take what I have learned about living life to the fullest and living for God’s glory and about the friendship issue, and to apply it to my life next year.

Finally, now for the amazing thing that happened to me just after Christmas, well I was reading up on my book called God’s Answers To Life’s Difficult Questions and recapping some stuff on the purpose driven life coupled with doing some reflection. God seem to answer my prayers and my search for answers about life. And, MOST IMPORTANTLY, IT HAS CHANGED MY LIFE FOREVER. Firstly, reading the purpose driven life again, I found something said in it which helps clear things up a bit that I previously didn’t notice, basically, it says that Knowing your purpose simplifies your life, it defines what you do and what you don’t do. Your purpose becomes the standard you use to evaluate which activities are essential and which aren’t. You simply ask, “Does this activity help me fulfil one of God’s purposes for my life?” It also says it is impossible to do everything and that we only have enough time to do God’s will. So that answers my question as to how to decide what to do with my life. Thus, I realise how to utilise my knowledge of the purpose of life, basically by doing things that fit into God’s purposes for our lives whenever possible or wherever possible or whatever possible. All I have to do is now come up with activities which I can do to fulfil the criteria. However, an issue cropped up again, well, there are so many different things that we can do that fall into the category of God’s purposes for our lives. But, that is where I believe now that our shape comes in, God made us in such a way that we enjoy certain things more than other things and we have greater abilities in certain things. So in order, to decide what to do with my life, I realise that all I need to do is to do the stuff that I want to do and can do that are part of God’s purpose for my life. This is basically then, a good indication of God’s will for our lives. And, speaking of God’s will, God’s will is actually what God wants us to do and is His perfect plan for our lives. But, very often due to the fact that we have freedom of choice, we as imperfect human beings sometimes end up not doing God’s will for our lives and that as a result leads to some suffering, however, God uses all the good and bad things to accomplish good in the end. So our task is to try our very best with God’s help, to do His will. But, to live for God means to have a surrendered life, which means doing God’s will, so we need to be careful that we do not to end up doing what we want or our own will to glorify God, it is just a guide as to the things that God wants us to do, and at times God wants us to do things that we do not particularly like. This is generally in the case where either God puts a circumstance in our lives or entrusts us with a task to do that requires us to do things that are difficult or not something we want to do. Basically, what I’ve been saying is that as said on the excerpt from gotquestions.com:

God rarely gives people that direct and specific of information. God allows us to make choices regarding those things. The only decision God does not want us to make is the decision to sin or resist His will. God wants us to make choices that are in agreement with His will. So, how do you know what God’s will is for you? If you are walking closely with the Lord and truly desiring His will for your life – God will place His desires on your heart. The key is wanting God’s will, not your own. “Delight yourself in the LORD and He will give you the desires of your heart” (Psalm 37:4). If the Bible does not speak against it, and it can genuinely benefit you spiritually - then the Bible gives you the "permission" to make decisions and to follow your heart.

So, in essence life is about living for the purposes that God puts us here for looking forward to eternity and to trust that God will ensure we have all we need to do so and to allow His will to work thru our lives by the things he sets our hearts to do and give glory to Him, which brings us joy and fulfilment in life. And, life is what we make of it, so there’s no greater or other way to live life other than a surrendered life for Christ. Also, life is truly about the simple things and is about give and take. It’s purely about living for Christ alone and for His purposes…and it’s that simple. My trouble all this while was just finding out what God wants me to do and taking the initiative to do these things. But, truly this week as I had these greater insights into issues about life, I was reminded not to take things into my own hands but to let Jesus take the wheel, and that all I need to want to do is God’s will for my life. We were put on this planet to do God’s will that is all. And, I admit that at times I don’t feel like doing what God wants me to do, but I know that God can give me the desire to do His will, and every moment I just pray that God will give me a desire to do His will and bring Him glory. Even now, I pray that God will give me the passion and desire to do His will, coz I realise that I try to do what I want too much. But, I know truly that I believe in Christ and He is Lord of my life, I want to do and I want to feel like doing what God wants me to do. And, my choice is to do what God wants me to do, even if at times I dun feel like it. Right now, I just am so happy and all I want to do is give thanks to the Lord, for God has really reminded me of truly what life is really all about, and has given me back this great passion for His name.

As for how the God’s Answers to Life’s Difficult Questions has made an impact on my life, it has really allowed me to understand more about life and how I should live my life in the face of all that life throws at me. Basically, I’ve learned to apply God’s word in my life and it has made me aware of areas in my life which I need to change. So, truly what I’ve gained from reading the books I’ve mentioned and meditating on God’s word is a LIFE CHANGING EXPERIENCE.

Firstly, stress, I’ve learned that we need to know who we are in Christ, coz if we try to be someone we are not and set unrealistic targets for ourselves we will end up being stressed out. Also, we must know that all we do is to please God not Man. I realise that sometimes I’m affected too much by criticism and conflict. But, we need to focus only on pleasing God, coz we cannot please everyone. And, we must not let the demands of others to pressurise ourselves. Next, we need to decide what we want to achieve, to do only what matters most. Furthermore, we’ve got to focus on one thing at a time. Quite importantly, we also must realise that we cannot do it all by ourselves, our strength is from God and we only need to do our best and leave it to God. The reason that we get tense because we feel like everything depends on us and if we let go everything will fall apart. But, we can delegate others to help too, which we are often afraid to do as we are not sure if someone else can do a good job. Also, we need to sit still in silent prayer, as it allows us to recharge our spiritual batteries. Taking time off to enjoy life is needed too. We are commanded to rest and balance in life is necessary. Finally, we can give it all to the Lord and let God transform our lives.

Secondly, failure, when we try our best but we still fail, we must realise that we shouldn’t give up for God wants us to have success, He is sad when we fail. But, to achieve success we need to let God have complete access to our lives so that He can bless us. I mean God is the almighty we can be sure that God is in control and we don’t have to fear failure. Next, we need to cooperate with God’s plan, we must learn to have faith and trusts and follow God’s plan, to let God direct our paths. We must trust that God will keep His promises and bless us if we let Him work His plan out in our lives. Then, about depression, it meant much to me since I’ve actually gone through so many moments of depression this year. We get depressed due to bad circumstances or faulty thinking. In fact, our emotions are caused by our thoughts as the book points out. Only when we have the correct attitude towards life, are transformed by the renewing of our minds and when we know the truth can we be set free from depression. To overcome this, we must focus on the facts and not on our feelings which are very often unreliable. Next, we shouldn’t compare ourselves with others for all God wants from us is to be ourselves, not that we refuse to change if we know we are in the wrong but it means that we accept our strengths and weaknesses. Also, we shouldn’t take false blame and we shouldn’t exaggerate the negative. We should take care of ourselves, give our frustrations to God, get a fresh awareness of God’s presence of God and gain a new direction for life.

The other issue is about having a peace of mind in the stressful lifestyle of the 21st century. It is about being meek to be quietly confident and unruffled even if everything seems to be in a mess. But, there are as mentioned in the book 4 issues of life that we must understand to have a peace of mind. Firstly, we need to know who we are, then we need to take responsibility of our own attitude, we can’t choose our circumstances but we can choose to use it to make us bitter or better, which I realise that I’ve many a times let things make me bitter, so it made me realise that all this while I was taking the wrong attitude towards life and all I needed to do was to choose the right response to my difficult circumstances. Next, we must decide our priorities and live for what is the most important and that is for God’s glory. Lastly, we need to face our difficulties and to live by faith and persevere.

The next issue is about overcoming problems. We know that we all face problems in life but the most important thing is how we handle them. Coz, whether we like it or not life is a series of problems. To deal with problems in our lives there are several principles. Firstly, we have to identify the enemy in overcoming these problems in life, and that is very often our attitude, it is more often than not our attitude which gets us down rather than the problem. Next, we need to admit our inadequacies, for we are nothing without God’s help. Only God has the power to help us overcome the problems in our lives, and instead of looking at our problems and how big they seem, we should focus on God who is greater than any problem life can throw at us. Also, we should seek God’s help through prayer. It is also important that we relax in faith. When we try to do everything by our own power we are not good enough, but let God live our lives, for God is the source of our strength and we can have victory in Christ. Finally, we are to thank God in advance in faith because we know that God can solve all our problems.

Now, about being confident in the face of the storms of life, two we shouldn’t do as stated is to drift or discard or despair but we are to be anchored by three things in the face of the storms of life. First, it is the Lord’s presence, the Lord is with us through it all and He will never leave us nor forsake us. God also has a purpose for our lives. He has a plan for our lives and the storms that we face in life are what allow us to fulfil God’s purpose for our lives. Lastly, we are to trust in God’s promises, and that is that He will help us ride the storms of life and overcome it all.

But, truly the four other chapters of the book are the ones that made the greatest impact on my life and have definitely changed my life forever. One, the first chapter that I read which is chapter 11 btw is about how I can overcome loneliness. Basically, loneliness has been one of the biggest issues in my life especially in the last two years during my JC life. Thus, it was so relevant to me, these few pages. It starts off with the fact that loneliness is the most miserable feelings and is determined by our relationship to the people around us, not by the number of people. It is caused by transition, separation, opposition or rejection. But, the Bible tells us how to deal with loneliness as is shown in the book. The ways that people try to overcome it is to work very hard so they don’t feel it or to get a lot of things around them so that they will feel satisfied and happy, but none of these methods work. I must say that I’ve tried these wrong methods before. Many times this year and last year I’ve tried to keep myself busy and even buy things and try to have everything but it failed to work after awhile. What I wanna say though is that, it wasn’t that I didn’t know it wouldn’t work but subconsciously I was drawn into that. I also must stress that I was never into the whole materialism thing, in fact I rarely spend on things. Only thing I ever really buy is music CD’s…lol.

Anw, but it says in the book that we are to make the best of the bad situation and to UTILISE the time, to use it to do a good thing instead of complaining, I must say that it is true that I complained a lot, but I didn’t really know what else I could do, now though what this book has taught in dealing with it is to make something of it and so it has made me realise this and I really am inspired by this book to change from complaining about what I can’t change to doing more productive things with my life whenever I feel the same way again. Next, to deal with loneliness requires us to minimise the hurt. Not to allow it to make one bitter and not to be resentful. Coz as the book says, RESENTMENT WOULD ONLY MAKE ONE LONELIER AND BUILD A WALL AROUND ONES LIFE. RESENTMENT LOCKS ONE IN A SELF-IMPOSED PRISON AND DRIVE PEOPLE AWAY BECAUSE NO ONE LIKES A CYNIC, A PERSON WHO IS ALWAYS BITTER AND COMPLAINING. I want to say just as Paul in the Bible said, I WANT TO BE A BETTER PERSON NOT A BITTER PERSON. I realise that this is exactly what I’ve done which made me lose any hope of making close friends from my JC life. Just as the song How To Save A Life says: I lost a friend, somewhere along in the bitterness. Bitterness built walls around me. This was the point where I realised that this book was going to change my life, coz it painted a picture of my JC life, and made me see how I have been living in the wrong way in response to my loneliness. But, since after reading this, I really hope to change and handle it in the right way now. Thus, it was a life changing moment for me. Anw, the other two points are to realise that God is always with us and so we are never alone. I rmb that many times the past year I failed to realise that God was with me, so I was not alone. But, on occasion where I felt God’s presence my loneliness just seemed to fade away. The other is to empathise and help others, I realise that I focussed too much on myself and did not look out to other people and help other lonely people. I realise that I needed to stop building walls but to start building bridges. I should be saying was “God, help me be a friend to somebody today”, instead of saying “God, I’m so lonely”. These four things I’ve learned to do however from this book is truly the right way to deal with loneliness which previously I didn’t follow, but this book has now has allowed me to see the situation clearly and has made me want to change. I just really pray for God to help me conquer loneliness and I hope that people will now give me a chance and allow me to be more of a friend today and to truly overcome loneliness and have friends. Indeed, I know I’ve changed after reading this, now all I wanna do is just put this into practise in my life. And, God is all I need, ultimately He fills that vacuum. I’m different now, I’m not gonna be sitting here being unhappy and complaining anymore but do what really needs to be done, amazing, I feel so changed…and it’s truly great. Now, I know the truth and it has changed my perspective of life, I’m never gonna be the same again, I’m truly gonna be a better person with this knowledge I know it.

Then, the next one I read was about How Can I Ever Change. I realised that God seem to be speaking to me through these pages since after reading the chapter on loneliness that was exactly what was on my mind, about how I can change especially since I had always been having the wrong attitude about issues in my life. Well, it says that God wants us to change and it is part of growth. There are basically four steps in the process of change as the book states. It begins with crisis. God changes us by getting our attention first, by putting us in a frustrating situation that is beyond our control, and it makes us tire out. It’s a matter of making us want to change by getting us fed up coz we only change if we are fed up with our situation. God does this for our own good and to let us grow. And, amazingly I’ve really felt that I’ve been put into through a lot of difficult and unhappy and discontented situations this year, and it actually gives me great joy and comfort to know that, because I’m realising that God is likely that the crises in my life is God’s way of preparing me for change in my life, which I’ve prayed for, for months now, I mean not just in terms of from the mistakes I’ve repeatedly made in my Christian life but also from this life lived which I’ve been so unsure of how to live my life the way God intended me to and the uncertainty in handling the various circumstances in my life such as loneliness. Next, it’s commitment. We have to be persistent in staying with the situation until we work it out. I really identify with this in my life as I’ve really been in a constant search to change my life from merely existing to truly living and I’ve made headway. On the other hand, I probably feel there are other areas in my life where I have to remind myself to be persistent in working out, which I haven’t worked out yet and to avoid giving up on these things in my life. God also waits awhile before helping one turn things around to test our faith and whether we are serious abt it, and would often miss it when we give up too quickly. Then, we are to come humbly to God and admit our faults, sins, weaknesses and mistakes. Very often, we blame our circumstances or other people for our problems, but we should look at ourselves. We confess, because we must realise that God is right and we have a problem, and God is the only one who can help us with his resources and power to help us change for the better. And, ultimately God is in control not us. Finally, we are to follow God’s plan and let Him change us and use us for great things. God knows how to bring out the best in our lives and He knows how to do it better than us. He will use whatever necessary to achieve His goal if we let Him. We are also to trust in God’s power to change our lives and not in our own strength. It made me realise that I should allow God to help me live a good life by His power by seeking His will for my life and surrendering it all to God. And, sometimes God puts weaknesses in people to help them change for the better. It made me realise that perhaps my physical problems or whatever problems in my life were there to prevent me from making the same mistakes. And, as mentioned, God when He changes us it’s permanent and we do not need to worry about having the will power to stay the same coz God gives us the strength and changes us forever. Until, we give our faults and weaknesses to God we cannot change. So it made me truly turn my weaknesses to God. That’s why now I believe that I’m changed forever and I’m gonna be a better person…and it’s an awesome feeling, and I can feel it in me that I’m no longer the same person again, I’ve become a completely better and different person. And, all I can say is praise God.

To end, just wanna share about the question relating to why bad things happen since I feel its crucial thing as I’ve learned from the book. And, the other one on living above average, which well has given me a revelation as to how I should live my life and live a full life of great significance, more than just existing which contributed to my complete understanding now of how to live life and what it is all about together with what I’ve learned from the purpose driven life and my own reflections. Firstly, as for what we should know when we don’t understand why bad things happen is that, God sees everything we go through and He cares, God has given everyone free will and so bad things happen because not everybody chooses to do God’s will. But, God is in ultimate control of the final outcome. He uses all the good and all the BAD circumstances and use them for good, turning around even the bad things. Even when everything seems to fall apart, God has the final say. It really just gave me reassurance and reminded me that I don’t have to worry about all the bad things in life but to trust that in the end the Lord will do good with it. We must not however, delve in self-pity which a lot of times I must say I have done so and sometimes am tempted to. And, we cannot afford to be bitter. But, we are to turn it over to God. What we can do when bad things happen in our lives is to, one, is to trust God’s perfect plan which takes everything bad and turn in to good at the final. “All things work for the good of those who love Him”, is what the Bible says. God uses bad thing to develop us and to bring glory to His name. Secondly, we can trust in the promises of God which are promises that give us hope, strength and comfort. Next, we can face the troubles together with a caring community of people, friends and family. Finally, the presence of God can help us through any situation. We can turn to God always to turn things around in our lives for good, all we have to do is let God take over.

The final one about living above average, then. God intended for everyone to live a life that is above average and not mediocre. Just as I desire to live life to the fullest, I realise that actually that is how God intended for us to live, to live a full life and a life of significance. But, we must realise that the life like this is not about owning things, having power or enjoying pleasure or even for that matter being a successful person. It is about living an honourable life. There are three secrets to making our lives above average. Firstly, we are to have great ambition. Meaning that we must want to do something big and significant with our lives and ask God to bless us. We often drift through life because we have no goals, no master plan, no overall purpose, and no ambition. Thus nothing is accomplished and we only exist. We need to have a dream, without, we lose direction. And when we stop setting goals, we stop growing. God made us for growth, to develop and dream. To do this we need to live for the purpose God has for our lives specifically. This really struck me as before Christmas and the few days after that I had been pondering about how I should decide what to do with my holiday and life for that matter. I mean knowing that life is about living for God’s glory and God’s purpose for our life, it still doesn’t help that it is so broad to find out what to do. So, I realise that it is ok for us to have our own dreams and ambitions, and in fact we need to have both of these in the pursuit of a life lived for God’s glory. And, the misconception is that sometimes lack the courage and faith to do the thing we wanna do. And, to be content in all circumstances doesn’t mean to have no ambitions, goals or desires. But, it is about enjoying everyday to the fullest even if our dreams and ambitions have not been fulfilled yet. We also tend to confuse small thinking with spirituality.

This made me realise what it truly means to be content, and that yes even though having ambition seems contradictory to surrendering our dreams to God, it is a basic drive of life. Next, we must have faith, the faith to believe that God can help us achieve great things. And, that we can through Christ achieve great things even with disabilities, and how relevant I thought to me, in that I face that very circumstance. Finally, we have to pray to God. To pray for God’s power in our lives. Ambition is good as long as we have genuine motives and, we can never out dream God, so we can ask go for big requests and He will answer it in His time. We just need to trust God and dream big, and ask God to bless us and offer it to God, who will do greater things than we could ever dream of. To pray for God’s presence in our lives, for we need God’s help. Lastly, we are to pray for God’s protection also. Thus, to have God’s best for our lives we just got to do these things. Right now, really I tell you, I think I finally know how to really live a meaningful life that matters, and it’s truly such a joy…it’s like I don’t have any more issues in my life anymore, for in every situation, I know what to do and I know how to live my life the right way, and that’s all that matters, for all we need to do is to live life the way it should be lived.

So to end, I just wanna say that it’s amazing, and truly I feel like I’m FOREVER CHANGED. I’m now completely the person God intended for me to be. I really must say that it has been all God’s doing and I just give thanks. I’ve never ever felt so near to God before and my heart is just full of praise. I now know what I need to know, and I’m am really beginning from this day forward the start of 2009 onward TO LIVE LIFE THE WAY IT SHOULD BE LIVED, and there’s nothing more I could ask for…yea.

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