Unlike Any Other...
Well, it's a new month again and I'm blogging again, whatever that means. Anw, so last week, i gotta say i was really bored again, in fact now i dun know how i'm going to last until i start uni hopefully. But, anw like i said the other time i was feeling really good again, however, that all-time high feeling, well, the hype about it has faded for me. Things are still going pretty well though, apart from a few moments in the past week where i wasn't feeling anything at all, kinda of like not awesome but not bad either. The past week i mostly did the same things, com, TV and chess, except that i borrowed some videos to watch which took away only several hours of boredom, i was also sick the past week and i did some writeup on my testimony for our pastor. So yea, not much to say actually, i guess for the first time in a long time I'm going to post a short post.
Basically, the first thing is that I felt a very unique feeling the past week, kind of because yea as everyone knows and is anticipating, A Level results are about to be released and i'm going back to school and will see my classmates who i haven't seen for several months now. Horrible, how can i have made no contact with classmates the whole of the holiday so far, and whatever it is, I'm a different person now, i can take that in my stride, just happy that i get to see them again anw. But, i must say i do regret the way i handle myself socially in school in the last two years. So my point is that, about my feeling, i felt a surreal feeling of nostalgia mixed with regret about the past things in my life in ACJC, yet also missing the opportunities i once had but wasted and remembering the good times i had in ACJC however few and wishing and missing the good times back at school. On the other hand, i'm also feeling a sense of how far i've come since the start of JC life to now, i realise how much i was so noobish almost back then but have well become the person i am today that is, I'm much more aware of and have a more complete picture of life, i mean coz previously i was like a frog in the well. And, so now that i also know how to handle the situation in my life as a teen in JC, i just can't help but wonder how much more i could have got out of my JC life. Well, i guess, that's all in the past, i just really hope somehow i can get a second chance to know my classmates better even though we have and will go our separate ways now, but i'm aware that sometimes things have happened and you can't go back. At least, i know i've learned valuable lessons from these experiences and hopefully in future i won't make the same mistakes. Now, I finally understand, the feeling of leaving school and how one just misses it so much even though in the past it was a dread and the feeling of being connected or attached to the school one was once from long after one has left. The feeling I've been having for the past week has mostly been about going back to school but also I had other unrelated feelings that contributed to an overall strange feeling last week. It's like, I've also been having such a long holiday and have been doing very little, and I'm just really wanting to make every present moment meaningful and fun, so that's been frustrating but also I'm really excited to see if life will throw up an adventure for me and opportunities for me to enjoy this holiday and do more with it. And, I'm also in anticipation about my future with A Level results being out soon and a long road ahead of me with many more months of free time. With all i've learnt i also can't wait to use my experiences to really live life well in my life ahead of me and I just want to embrace life and be happy and at peace with everything. Well, so overall, the feeling is somewhat bittersweet, especially about the school thing. But yet not quite either...I would say THIS IS A FEELING UNLIKE ANY OTHER THAT I'VE EXPERIENCED, probably not the best feeling but certainly a new one for me. I feel so much more like a different person now, i truly believe that I've grown to be almost the person i feel is most me, i've sort of like found myself, and like i feel like matured to the level that I've broken through and overcome certain barriers and short comings i had in the past. Like, I'm a whole lot clearer spiritually, in living life for the purpose we were put here for by God, in embracing life and enjoying each and every day and even just how to handle the friendship and loneliness issue. I really feel like everything is sort of perfectly back in place, even if things aren't completely perfect. But, definitely i'm at a better place in my life now. My spiritual life is really back in shape and my faith is feeling good again, my heart again is just feels so worshipful again, i feel God's presence, i filled with passion and desire for God's glory again, I feel a deeper love in my heart, and I'm able to really trust the Lord greatly despite my circumstances or even dark moments or in great uncertainty as i used to do so well, and I'm filled with joy in all circumstances even bad stuff and there fulfilment and meaning in all i do. Everything is just great again and I'm continuing to believe things to be ok, and all is well, and that's awesome and i thank God so much.
Now then, the second and final thing i wanna say is about what i've just heard about positive psychology. Well, nothing new and something i've always known but never really put into practise in my life till recently. Remember, in my post about wanting to go back to a time when everything seemed just perfect, in it i wrote the things i wanted for my life that i feel would make it perfect and i wrote it with the belief that these things will happen for me and true enough the next week, all was perfect and felt really great. That is exactly what i wanna share about. Well, during the week, i happen to watch The Oprah Show and on screen was about this psychology thing on How To Heal Your Life, and how if you think postively things will turn out that way too and how by being grateful and having the right perspective, the world will conspire in our favour, something like what the message of The Alchemist is conveying. And, there were these life coaches teaching about it and really it's amazing how they know the key to life and if everyone really learns this it will truly change lives. And, they did some board thing with all the things they hope for in their lives, and from real life examples, it really works, people actually end up achieving many of their dreams thru this, just by living with a positive attitude it will bring about actions in our lives and opportunities that will pave the way to a better future. But, really more than this is the Christian life, when we surrender all our hopes and dreams to go He does great things in our lives beyond our wildest dreams. Not that, i'm saying there is any direct link here but i guess in life that is the way to life to live positively, i think that is probably how God intended life to be, not that we are relying on positive thinking but in Christ we can live positively. I guess what i mean is that Christ is ultimately at the core of everything in life, thru Him only do we really live our best lives but that having a positive attitude is one of the personal keys to living life well. Back in JC I was so caught up with things that i wasn't positive and things turned out poorly, but know i finally get what it means to be positive and it's amazing really. So anw, the conclusion of the matter is that WHAT YOU BELIEVE IS WHAT YOU GET IN LIFE...SO BE POSITIVE AND THAT'S WHAT YOU GET FROM LIFE...
To end, some good news, I've finally began Baptism Class this Sunday. And, so i just wanna say anw that it's really a one of a kind feeling being done with school and stuff, a whole new world out here, and being back at school gonna be great, but i know i always remember school and have this feeling of missing the times gone by and yet always be connected forever...it's really bittersweet. And, as for life, truly, be positive and trust the Lord, that is the key to living life well. If you believe positively, similarly, it will manifest in your life, so always be positive never negative no matter what, for all things work for the good of those who love Him, and live life...yea...(=
Basically, the first thing is that I felt a very unique feeling the past week, kind of because yea as everyone knows and is anticipating, A Level results are about to be released and i'm going back to school and will see my classmates who i haven't seen for several months now. Horrible, how can i have made no contact with classmates the whole of the holiday so far, and whatever it is, I'm a different person now, i can take that in my stride, just happy that i get to see them again anw. But, i must say i do regret the way i handle myself socially in school in the last two years. So my point is that, about my feeling, i felt a surreal feeling of nostalgia mixed with regret about the past things in my life in ACJC, yet also missing the opportunities i once had but wasted and remembering the good times i had in ACJC however few and wishing and missing the good times back at school. On the other hand, i'm also feeling a sense of how far i've come since the start of JC life to now, i realise how much i was so noobish almost back then but have well become the person i am today that is, I'm much more aware of and have a more complete picture of life, i mean coz previously i was like a frog in the well. And, so now that i also know how to handle the situation in my life as a teen in JC, i just can't help but wonder how much more i could have got out of my JC life. Well, i guess, that's all in the past, i just really hope somehow i can get a second chance to know my classmates better even though we have and will go our separate ways now, but i'm aware that sometimes things have happened and you can't go back. At least, i know i've learned valuable lessons from these experiences and hopefully in future i won't make the same mistakes. Now, I finally understand, the feeling of leaving school and how one just misses it so much even though in the past it was a dread and the feeling of being connected or attached to the school one was once from long after one has left. The feeling I've been having for the past week has mostly been about going back to school but also I had other unrelated feelings that contributed to an overall strange feeling last week. It's like, I've also been having such a long holiday and have been doing very little, and I'm just really wanting to make every present moment meaningful and fun, so that's been frustrating but also I'm really excited to see if life will throw up an adventure for me and opportunities for me to enjoy this holiday and do more with it. And, I'm also in anticipation about my future with A Level results being out soon and a long road ahead of me with many more months of free time. With all i've learnt i also can't wait to use my experiences to really live life well in my life ahead of me and I just want to embrace life and be happy and at peace with everything. Well, so overall, the feeling is somewhat bittersweet, especially about the school thing. But yet not quite either...I would say THIS IS A FEELING UNLIKE ANY OTHER THAT I'VE EXPERIENCED, probably not the best feeling but certainly a new one for me. I feel so much more like a different person now, i truly believe that I've grown to be almost the person i feel is most me, i've sort of like found myself, and like i feel like matured to the level that I've broken through and overcome certain barriers and short comings i had in the past. Like, I'm a whole lot clearer spiritually, in living life for the purpose we were put here for by God, in embracing life and enjoying each and every day and even just how to handle the friendship and loneliness issue. I really feel like everything is sort of perfectly back in place, even if things aren't completely perfect. But, definitely i'm at a better place in my life now. My spiritual life is really back in shape and my faith is feeling good again, my heart again is just feels so worshipful again, i feel God's presence, i filled with passion and desire for God's glory again, I feel a deeper love in my heart, and I'm able to really trust the Lord greatly despite my circumstances or even dark moments or in great uncertainty as i used to do so well, and I'm filled with joy in all circumstances even bad stuff and there fulfilment and meaning in all i do. Everything is just great again and I'm continuing to believe things to be ok, and all is well, and that's awesome and i thank God so much.
Now then, the second and final thing i wanna say is about what i've just heard about positive psychology. Well, nothing new and something i've always known but never really put into practise in my life till recently. Remember, in my post about wanting to go back to a time when everything seemed just perfect, in it i wrote the things i wanted for my life that i feel would make it perfect and i wrote it with the belief that these things will happen for me and true enough the next week, all was perfect and felt really great. That is exactly what i wanna share about. Well, during the week, i happen to watch The Oprah Show and on screen was about this psychology thing on How To Heal Your Life, and how if you think postively things will turn out that way too and how by being grateful and having the right perspective, the world will conspire in our favour, something like what the message of The Alchemist is conveying. And, there were these life coaches teaching about it and really it's amazing how they know the key to life and if everyone really learns this it will truly change lives. And, they did some board thing with all the things they hope for in their lives, and from real life examples, it really works, people actually end up achieving many of their dreams thru this, just by living with a positive attitude it will bring about actions in our lives and opportunities that will pave the way to a better future. But, really more than this is the Christian life, when we surrender all our hopes and dreams to go He does great things in our lives beyond our wildest dreams. Not that, i'm saying there is any direct link here but i guess in life that is the way to life to live positively, i think that is probably how God intended life to be, not that we are relying on positive thinking but in Christ we can live positively. I guess what i mean is that Christ is ultimately at the core of everything in life, thru Him only do we really live our best lives but that having a positive attitude is one of the personal keys to living life well. Back in JC I was so caught up with things that i wasn't positive and things turned out poorly, but know i finally get what it means to be positive and it's amazing really. So anw, the conclusion of the matter is that WHAT YOU BELIEVE IS WHAT YOU GET IN LIFE...SO BE POSITIVE AND THAT'S WHAT YOU GET FROM LIFE...
To end, some good news, I've finally began Baptism Class this Sunday. And, so i just wanna say anw that it's really a one of a kind feeling being done with school and stuff, a whole new world out here, and being back at school gonna be great, but i know i always remember school and have this feeling of missing the times gone by and yet always be connected forever...it's really bittersweet. And, as for life, truly, be positive and trust the Lord, that is the key to living life well. If you believe positively, similarly, it will manifest in your life, so always be positive never negative no matter what, for all things work for the good of those who love Him, and live life...yea...(=
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